Dear Bloggie...
He held on to her, she wanted to leave, goodbye she said, I'm sorry he said.
I was wrong...
So bloody wrong...
I tried to keep it together, but in the end I lost it...
I wish I was stronger than this...
I wish I didn't need anybody...
I wish I stopped disturbing those around me...
I wish... I wish... I wish...
But this ain't no fairy tale...
Wishes don't come true...
Unicorns and rainbows don't exist...
Love...is a made up myth...
How did I become this way...
Was I just too naive?
The one person who finally understands me, is walking the other direction...
What did I do?
What have I become?
Apologising doesn't actually work anymore...
The damage I caused has already been done...
Somehow there's a little voice in me telling me to just stop...
There's no point anymore...
Love is impossible, a dream, a mere illusion...
What's the use in believing?
Trust? What's that?
Who am I to tell someone the definition of trust and love?
Who the hell do I think I am?
I'm no one now...
No one again...
No one special ever again...
What's the point of trying over and over and over again...
When the result is always the same...
Might as well I be cold, heartless and don't bother anyone...
No one needs me anyway...
I could literally live in my room the whole year, and no one would notice...
Stop trying to be somebody Fiq...
This is who you are, sad, lonely, depressed and stupid...
Stuck in a vicious cycle and there's no way of coming out...
This is life.
How it was intended for me, and how I should follow it...
Dreams are for those with hope...
I lost hope...
I don't even know what it means, hope.
Expectations and reality...
Patience and Virtue...
Fuck that shit...
Everytime I rise back up, I fall deeper and harder...
I wish to stay down here...
Where there's nothing expected of me...
Let me be happy in my own twisted ways...
Maybe I simply thrive in depression...
I've lost every ounce of happiness...
I don't expect anyone around me to stay...
I'll only hurt them anyway...
So it's best if I kept everything to myself...
And so, the Depression begins...
*The darkness lingers behind the light, whispering, twisting reality, falsifying truth, bending facts... Until he finally gave in... He lost the ability to find the light, as he was bathed in darkness...*
Let it burn, let it all burn...
